Fall Equinox Reflection 2020
Blessings of the Fall Equinox to you, when the cosmic wheel of the seasons flows from summer to autumn bringing opportunity to pause and reflect. As the leaves release from their temporary home in the “Tree People” and fall to the Earth letting go of what has been, death of the old, we also are asked to look at what we need to let go of that no longer serves our lives.
As many of the winged-people and four-leggeds gather bounty from the fruits of summer, we two-leggeds are asked by the wisdom of the seasons to reflect on what has grown in us during the summer. This year, as we were pressured in many ways with COVID-19 threats and restrictions, out-of-control fires, smoke-filled skies, violence towards peaceful Black Lives Matter protesters, friends who lost homes, etc., there is much to reflect on and ask ourselves.
What will serve us as the Light of Father Sun moves further away and we have to find the light within our selves and each other? Following are some thoughts from wisdom elders that may help you find your way:
Here is one from Rumi on the truth of our deepest being.
“The external world is not at all how it seems. Neither are you. Beneath the convincing separateness of things is a vast, indescribable loving Unity. That Unity your true identity.”
Viktor Frankl addresses mindful choice of how we use the instrument of our minds.
“Between a stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom. The last of human freedoms is to chose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances.”
David Cooper reminds us of how we each make a difference.
“The sense of self continuously dissolves as we merge into a vast interconnectedness with all of creation bringing the presence of the Divine into as many moments of life as possible. Each time we do something that raises consciousness we lift sparks of divinity within us all and within all things to new levels.”
Cosmologist Brian Swimme offers support to our membership in the Starlight Ohana here to polish up our stardust and shine.
“The universe has unfolded to this point. It has poured into you the creative powers necessary for its further development. When you breathe, you breathe the creations of a star… Every element, every atom that composes your body was fashioned in the heat of a star. You are that star, brought into a form of life that enables life to reflect on itself. The simple truth is that we are here through the creativity of the stars.”
The equinox is a time the cosmos speaks to us about balance since it is a time of equal day and night, light and dark. It reminds us to look at where we are out of balance in our own lives and in our society and use that information to take action steps to come back into balance.
May we all release heartedly with grace what needs to go. May we all gather heartedly that which strengthens our hearts and minds, our bodies and spirits, for the work we are all called to do in helping to birth a more peaceful, just, healthy and happy win-win world for all.
May it be so for all of us and our precious and threatened Mother Earth and All Our Relations.
Love, tomás
An American Billboard: a Poem
an American billboard
driving north on rt. 101
pass Gilroy
garlic capitol of the world
wide open spaces
huge irrigated fields of mono crops
campesinos harvesting
talking with andrea
met when we were
eighteen
love growing
through
the years
sudden shock
huge billboard
add for tractor
sez
“Conquer Your Land”
are you shitting me?
and yet
there it is
up front
how we got here
control
dominate
no wonder
the problems
the suffering
got it backwards
from what
we once knew
respectful
humble
harmonious
relationship
with the powers
that give life
Sacred Covenant
with Earth
Ocean
Desert
Forest
Mountain
Ancestors
Butterfly
Wind
Fire
Plants
Praying mantis
still time
though
growing short
purification
cleansing
rebirth
evolution
growing us
up
to
higher consciousness
that knows
truth
kindness
love
that is
for
giving
Evolutionary Pressure: What Does COVID-19 Want Us to Grow Into
Evolutionary pressures – what does the Universe want us to grow into?
How glaciers formed mountains, racism, corona virus and climate change are evolutionary pressures pushing us into new ways of being. They are symptoms that need to be addressed but unless we continuously want to be symptom-treaters we ultimately need to address root causes. Beneath anxiety, fear, prejudice, discrimination and violence to the other, to the earth and the living ecosystem is a perception and belief that people, plants, animals, earth, ocean, and sky are all distinct, separate entities, disconnected from one other. As we go about trying to meet our needs this consciousness of separation leads to behaviors that cause harm to that which is perceived to be “not-us”. We see a world of scarcity so we fearfully compete with others to make sure we get ours and for those of us with white skin more likely to do so than others with darker skin. Yet still all of us suffer from the ills that beset the world which are evolutionary pressures from the Universe, from God, Spirit, the Tao, pushing us to grow into more of who and what we really are towards realization of our greatest potentials.
Our current situation is analogous to a situation where the various organs within our body perceive and think they are separate from one another. Each is concerned with getting its needs met so they compete with each other for the nutriments they need to survive totally oblivious to the deeper reality that they are inter-wovenly connected and dependent upon each other’s cooperation to survive and thrive. So too we humans compete with each other, along with countries who compete with each other fed by patriotic nationalism where whatever county you live in you are socialized to believe in is the greatest thing going.
I remember starting each day in elementary school on with having to stand and recite the pledge of alliance while one kid held the American flag and god-forbid if the poor kid inadvertently touched it to the ground! Major shaming from the teacher. All based on the perception and belief in separation.
The intensifying crisis of today’s world is pushing us to wake up to recognize that like the organs of the body, all of humanity, all nations separated by arbitrary boundaries based on political realities, are part and parcel of a unified field in which every “thing” is connected and that there is no such thing as a separate thing. The win/lose scenery which is a natural outgrowth of the reality-as-separate paradigm leads to the path we are on now – a small group of mostly white corporate-enriched elitists getting their needs met living in barricaded enclaves guarded by their paid private militias while the rest try to survive amidst the ravages of climate catastrophe and weather-related calamities for whatever scraps might be left over, if anything, after the elites have taken all they want. That is where we are headed if we don’t change and change starts with the root if it is going to meaningful in the long run.
The evolutionary pressures are pushing us to the realization that the only win is a win-win for all, humanity acting cooperatively and wisely throughout the planet, which means in harmony with the powers of nature that give and sustain life. Humanity working together to create systemic structures that provide equal access and support to all in meeting basic needs and the nurturance of creative potentials towards their fullest blossoming and greatest good. We need to reweave the covenant by which our ancestors lived wherein they knew the earth was alive, that all of creation was alive and that they needed to meet their needs in ways that were in respectful relationship with those life-giving powers.
What does that mean in practical terms? It means realizing that there needs to be a balanced reciprocity between what we take from the environment and what we give back, inter-woven with re-learning how to take respectfully. Indigenous life-way traditions are good models for this because they recognize that reciprocity is sacred. They ask permission before they take, they do an honoring and thanks-giving to the spirits of what they take and they take only what they need and they do so in a way that supports that those living seven generations from now will also be able to live and thrive as they are doing. As compared to the rapacious insatiable take, take taking of modern life with no thought of thanking those powers that give the life, the spirits that are the essence underlying the physical manifestation of that which we are taking – animal, plant, oxygen, mineral, fuel etc.
In our indigenous minds there is an ancient heart-memory that knows all of creation is alive, that knows all is connected, that knows we are all related as relatives in the cosmic web of life. How to return to the consciousness of knowing this basic truth of what the universe is and how to work in harmony with the way it works, in reoccurring cosmic cycles of life, death and rebirth? The start is with intention for everything starts with intention. Intend to practice attentive, sensitive, humble receptivity to connect and align with the way life works on this wonderous planet we get to call home: Mother Earth, Turtle, Pachamoma, Gaia. Pay attention to how it all works. Attune to how it all works.
Start with the start of the day. The sun comes up in the east every morning bringing activity energy to the earth which activates the interactions of photosynthesis wherein plants take that energy and create oxygen, animals eat the plants, people eat the plants and animals and we have human life in all its diversity. Without that sunlight, that starlight brought to earth, we do not have life. What about facing the sun each morning, filling up your tanks with its energy, giving thanks for its gift? What about opening to the possibility that contained within the photon beams of light you are taking is not only fuel for life but also information – non-english, non-human information, but cosmic information on how to live a good life in harmony with all life? What if it is an expression of consciousness, a gift from the creative wisdom power of the universe trying to wake us up to the truth of our being?
What if it is telling us to do what it does, to shine? What if it is telling us that the essence of our physical being is not only made of stardust, which we already know from science that our bodies are comprised of atoms which were created in solar explosions, some of which migrated through the heavens to our planet, but that the essence of our being is luminosity? We are made of stardust and we are fueled by stardust. We are luminous beings.
What if we open our minds to understanding that light is in all of us, no matter what the color, shape or size we are, no matter what language we speak, no matter what religious beliefs we have, no matter what our gender or our sexual partnering. What if we recognize the importance of diversity to the resilience and continuation of life? We see with the cancerous spread of mono- farming that if a disease or insight blight attacks the one crop all is lost, but if there is a diversity of crops then there is a greater change of something surviving as compared to nothing. So too with humanity and its diversity of belief systems and social structures. Instead of striving for a mono-way of being and living driven by consumer culture and the billions spent annually manipulating us to buy the same products, the same clothes and consume the same entertainment in a sameness of conformity, how about honoring and nurturing our differences but knowing that not only are we all luminous beings worthy of respect, care and support, we are all in our essence of luminosity made of the energy of love? What if at the deepest essence of our being we are love? What if our love is for giving, to ourselves, to each other, to all beings and to Mother Earth in all her diversity?
What if shining up our stardust means setting an intention to be a love-giver, being a channel for the love-light that is the essence of our being and taking responsibility for the fact that we are constantly extending the energy of our thoughts and feelings out into the energy field of the earth like a broadcasting system? What if we recognize that because we are all connected, what we give to another, what we give to the earth, how we treat animals, forests, oceans, plants, mountains, streams, the air, comes back to us and impacts not only our lives but those of our children and grandchildren and all those yet to come?
What if we cultivate states of consciousness that bring us into experientially knowing our interconnectedness, our unity, our essential oneness? What if we have access to the infinite, creative wisdom of the universe? What if we use that access aligned in a shared intention of creating a Healthy and Just, Peaceful and Free, Beautiful and Diverse Win-Win World for All? What kind of world could we create? What kind of social and institutional structures might we create that every one on the planet had equal access to health care, education, protection, justice, food, clothing, housing and income so that no one was missing out? What if all were nurtured and supported to fulfill their highest creative potentials for wisdom, beauty and self-actualization? Would you like to live in that kind of a world? Would you like to have your great grandchildren live in that kind of a world? A world where everyone knew they were, and were treated as, sacred, worthy luminous being of love that is for giving.
The truth is that it is entirely possible to create such a world. We just have to hold this as a shared intention and then move into acton by showing up to do our part to deconstruct the beliefs and consciousness of separation, and the corporate capitalist, profit-driven, racist institutions that poison the earth and people towards each other driving the catastrophes that threaten to wipe out the human species taking many other species with us as we go.
It may seem impossible. It mean seem preposterous. It may seem to be a naive fantasy wish that could never be accomplished in the “real world”. Yet who would have put money on the motley, rag-tag army of colonialists defeating the most powerful army in the world in 1776? Who would have put money on the Berlin Wall coming down without a shot being fired? Who would have put money on people walking on the moon if you lived in the time of ancient Rome? Not too many that is for sure.
Dr. Martin Luther King spoke a message decades ago that still holds power for those of us living today when he shared what he thought was possible – “I have the audacity to believe that peoples everywhere can have three meals a day for their bodies; education and culture for their minds; and dignity, equality and freedom for the spirits.”
So let’s not just treat symptoms. Lets also address root causes and do what it takes to expand our consciousness to a wider bandwidth and to a deeper knowing of the truth of who and what we are and why we are here – sacred worthy luminous beings of love whose purpose is to live love now working to create the kind of world that is possible for all of us to be living in.
So polish up the light you are
come so far from a star
polish up the light you
to shine, shine, shine.
How to polish up a star so bright?
you hold it up
into the light
Shine on into darkness
shine on into night
shine on when its stressful
shine with all your might.
The Gifts of Grace: Twelve Boys and their Rites of Passage
As I prepared to take the 12 teenage boys out on Vision Quest, the weather spirits spoke and they spoke loudly. I got the news on the eve of our departure – Three days of big lightning storms blasting the Northern Sierra just where we were going to go on quest! Not safe given that we would be hiking over big stretches of granite to reach out intended site sooooo, instead of packing up after a full day at work I spent the evening frantically calling wilderness friends trying to find an alternative site that would work for what we were seeking. I went to bed late that night exhausted still not knowing where we were going to go and if we would have to cancel the whole trip. Postponing it was out of the question because parents had already made their summer plans around the date we had set up and the boys were all geared up and excited (but nervous and anxious as well).
Not much sleep as I was tossing and turning trying to figure out what to do until finally I got to the point where I had to just turn it over to spirit. It was beyond my control so I let it all go surrendering the whole situation into spirit’s hands. Then I could finally fall asleep for a few hours. Next morning Greg and I drove the rented van down to the school parking lot where we were meeting the boys and their families for our taking off ceremony. Standing in the center of two circles, the boys around me and their parents and sisters forming a larger circle surrounding us I gave them the news that our planned destination was out scratched due to bad weather. I shared that we would head up to the South Fork of the Yuba River in the Sierra foothills where I had led a quest last summer with a mentorship group of middle-aged men and hope that the base camp I had used previously would be available but there would be no way to know until we drove up and hiked several miles into the site. We were taking off into mystery not knowing if the site would work for this larger group even if base camp was available because there are limited flat spots along the river to camp within a safe distance where the boys could signal one another in case they got into trouble on their solo time. One of the boys had an extreme allergy to any kind of nuts and required hospitalization 20 minutes after giving himself a shot with his EPI Pen if he had a reaction. No way that could happen from where we would be so once again it required surrendering into the bigger hands with faith and trust that the boys, all forewarned, did not bring any items that could cause an allergic response.
On the drive up, the 12 boys, Greg Snowden and myself, the weather report said there was a 30 to 40% chance of a thunderstorm just about the time we would arrive at the start of the trail which you can see in the picture below as the boys are loading up their packs. I did my prayers that we would get a break and at least be able to hike in and set up our shelters before the rain hit and that the great base camp would be available. If not, we might have to drive back home that night since I could not come up with any other site that worked for our purpose. Again I surrendered letting go of attachment to outcome while trusting that whatever was for our greatest good would transpire and that would be what we had to deal with, all part of a “Coyote (trickster) Quest!”
The Gifts of Grace were plentiful beginning with perfect weather when we arrived and hiked in. The base camp site was available, the river was clear and beautiful with a fabulous swimming area right in front of our place with large boulders for the boys to scamper on and jump into the water. What a relief and great fun to watch them frolic in the beauty of the river, the magnificently shaped boulders and rocks and the sandy beachfront that was ours to enjoy. Some of the boys caught some crayfish that they cooked up for dinner that night.
After dinner we circled up with each boy sharing their intention for the quest. Their was a commonality of intention re: seeking more confidence and inner strength to face challenges in their lives, to try new things and to gain insight into themselves and the workings of nature. Each boy would be tested by fasting for a full day and night, something that growing 13 year old boys who eat ravenously and continuously would truly find challenging, along with facing nighttime fears sleeping out without a tent, worrying about bears, mountain lions, rattlesnakes and even news we heard hiking in about a crack head who was camped further up the river from us who was known to steal gear from others when it was left unguarded. Plenty of good stuff for the boys and their imagination to work with during the night.
Watching the boys set up their weather protection, prepare their meals, interact with each other, set up their gear and interacted with the environment allowed me to see not only their external behavior but also afforded a doorway into their hearts and souls. Greg and I were very fortunate as the boys all knew each other and were friends through my 13 year old grandson who provided the motivation for me to offer this experience in the first place, an opportunity for him and his buddies to experience some of the richness of questing work in the wilderness that has been such a treasure of growth and guidance and inspiration and wisdom in my own life. The boys were used to cooperating through their experiences in team sports and besides that they were really good guys; responsible, caring, intelligent, full of yearning for adventure and being tested. Just what I needed when I was 13 but didn’t get in a way that was meaningful for me.
It was an exciting adventure crossing the river with packs on coming and going with a few of us taking falls, including me, and some needing the help of others to right our selves in the current and slippery river-bottom rocks we were walking on. Thursday morning before the boys took off to their sites I shared with them how the tests they would face would be ones that they had chosen for themselves and would give them good practice in finding the resources they would need to meet the tests in their future lives would bring them challenges they had not chosen and the work they did now would serve them in the future. “Just by showing up to face yourself in these tests you have already proven your courage which is not the absence of fear but going forward with what your heart and soul calls you to do even though you are frightened.”
During my own solo time I had opportunity to reflect on how at the age of 13, I was already heading down a dark path of drug abuse (alcohol was the drug of my growing-up experience), anti-social and acting-out delinquent behavior. I felt so gifted that I could be with these healthy boys and give them what i so much wanted and needed at their age; respect for their thoughts and ideas, for their hopes and dreams, for their creativity and listening to and honoring the calling of their hearts and souls, versus being told by authority figures what to believe, what to do, what to feel and how to be. I loved giving them the space to make their own decisions, within reason and with some safety guidelines, from which they could learn from their own experiences rather than being lectured to and pressured to fit into a mold someone else had created that didn’t care about their own sense of integrity and authenticity. I loved showing my grandson a fisherman’s knot by which to tie two ends of a rope together in a really magical kind of way when helping him secure his shelter. He was as excited to see how it worked as i had been forty three years earlier when I had first learned it. I thought about the transmissions between generations and that one day he will pass this knot on to his own children.
The boys came back Friday morning from their fasting time all having been thoroughly tested and ready to eat a whole market’s worth of food. Afterwards we again sat in circle with each boy sharing what they had gotten from the quest, what “medicine” they were given to take home and use in their lives. The boys spoke of new found sense of strength, respect for food and empathy for those who do not have enough to eat around the world, the importance of self-restraint, how the fast helped them slow down to see more of what is all around them but they don’t ordinarily see or pay attention to in their busyness and activity, respect for people and animals, how everything is interconnected, respect for nature and how things work and finally an appreciation for silence.
I was very happy and relieved to have them all back safely together learning that morning how one boy had changed his site location in the night and had fallen while crossing the river, gotten soaked and spent the night wet and uncomfortable. Hearing about this I have thanks for the umpteenth time prior for no rain on our hike in and while setting up camp, for the warm weather that allowed for swimming and good-time play in the river, for no rattlesnake bites or allergic reactions that required emergency service, no problems with theft or threatening presence of others camping on the river, for the good spirit and cooperative and helpful attitude and caring behavior of the boys. Not once did I have to raise my voice when I needed their attention. Nor did I ever have to reprimand a boy about his behavior. So many gifts of grace and now another one hearing about the adventure of the boy who slipped in the river that he was ok. He could have hit his head, been knocked unconscious and drowned and I wouldn’t have even known about it until the morning! Thank you Great Spirit for the gifts of protection!
After breaking camp and cleaning up (I told the boys “We need to leave this campsite even better than when we found it so the spirits that live whose living room we have been in for these three days will fell good about our having been here”), we loaded up our packs, crossed the river with only one rescue needed, hiked back to the van and drove home to the waiting parents, sisters and brothers. Greg and I had a good time listening to their conversations, hearing their jokes and learning about their music tastes. Not sure that I want to take up hip-hop myself but it was great hearing them sing along. I also taught them a thank-you prayer song that we would sing to the parents at our closing circle which they enthusiastically spent time practicing several times on the car ride so they could sing it with confidence.
I had tasked each boy to write a support letter to themselves and one thanking their parents for whatever they were truly thankful which they would give to their parents upon return home. I had also asked the parents to do some homework writing about their own teenage years experiences and what they learned from them so that if they had the chance to do it again what would they do differently. The parents would give their boys their letter as well so it would be in interchange that would begin the integration process for both parties.
We did our closing circle at our house with a potluck the parents had prepared. The boys sang their song, shared a bit of what they got from the quest facing their parents in an outer circle as they stood with Greg and I in an inner circle. I gifted each with a bear claw necklace signifying the “strength of the great Mother Bear” honoring the strength they had shown in facing their fears which the necklace could serve as a reminder of when they faced challenges in the years to come. We finished our ceremony by all of us coming into one circle, holding hands during which i offered a thanks-giving prayer honoring the parents for doing such a good job raising the boys to this point and a last prayer blessing the boys as they went on into their future creating a good and meaningful life sharing their gifts to make a better world. Then we ate and wowee, glad I wasn’t footing the bill for the poundage of food they put away!
Thank you brother Greg for your helpful presence, support, wisdom and sharing taking time from work to be a vital part of this quest. And thank you for taking pictures that are included below. Thanks to my daughter Kimberly, Corbin’s mother for handling all the logistics so capably and graciously, thanks to Andrea for hosting the potluck at our home and thank you parents for trusting Greg and I with your precious sons, thank you One and All for your supportive prayers during our time on quest and thank you Great Mystery for taking such good care of us! We needed all the help we could get and through your caring and support the doorway opened for the numerous gifts of grace that came through to us all.
Un mil gracias por todo!